Oh boy. Random Cat has cried all night. Somewhere along the way I did manage to block out the pitiful wailing and get some sleep, but it must’ve started again with renewed vigor at 05:13, as it woke me again.

I dutifully trundled downstairs and fed Mog (first of course) and then returned upstairs with a sachet of food for our guest. Never have I seen food vanish so rapidly.

I had trouble escaping from the room though: every time I went to the door he would rush to me and headbutt me, purr and generally make a fuss. When I did manage to get the door open, he attempted escape. He’s back to the crying now. It would break my heart if I didn’t know that this was definitely for His Own Good. He just doesn’t like being alone in that room: when you are in there with him, he’s happy and purry and catnip-silly with pleasure.

There isn’t room to sleep in there with him; which is good, as I’m just soft-hearted and silly enough to consider that as an option.

Our local stray, Random Cat, has been accused of having problems with his left eye. Wednesday, it was seen to be leaking pus and ickiness, so this morning he was escorted to the V - E - T.

Now, since I’d had a conversation with my mother-in-law about transport and such, which Random overheard, he hadn’t been back here for food. It got to 06:50 this morning (his appointment was booked for 11:10) before he turned up at the restaurant door. He just cat-loafs outside the back door until someone feeds him, it’s quite endearing.

Anyway, I ceased to leave for work, and assisted in the cat-napping of the tabby individual. This picture shows how terrified he is to be Inside and trapped. It was heart-rending to hear him cry and see how scared he was.
He was duly examined by the Vet and pronounced to have a grass seed wedged in his left eye. Ouch indeed. With the application of a local anaesthetic and the skilful wielding of medical pliers, a removal was attempted. Sadly the seed remained lodged. Should this continue to be the case, an operation will be performed on Monday to remove the offending article. Poor Random.
A bottle of eyedrops was prescribed, with instructions to instil them four times daily. So far, he has one drop administered, and he took it without a whimper. I was impressed.

The decision was made to keep him in the spare room for the weekend, as attempting to locate our Littlest Hobo four times daily would be impossible. He actually seems comfortable and contented, which is a far cry from the expected situation. He is currently happily and purrily curled up in a cat bed and looking ridiculously cute.

I don’t think he’s a stray cat any more.

I have to record this momentous occasion: Mogret has let us sleep in! It is now 9am, and I woke before her.

I do hope she’s not broken. She was miowing last night as we were trying to sleep, which isn’t normal for her. She’s purry and friendly this morning and isn’t giving us any clues.

Philb thinks she may have knocked herself unconscious in her attempts to catch a woodpigeon yesterday, but I just don’t know.

Before I married philb, I shared a house and a life with another man, and a varying number of cats. Victoria Elvina, the eldest, was a regal, totally-black lady who ruled the household with an iron paw. We lost her in 2001: found her lying on the ground outside, having died some time during the night.

Her daughter, Myrrah, was a tabby and white cat of very little brain, and a timid personality. It took her three years to decide I was Not Monster, and not long after I left to decide I was Monster again. She died last week, of cancer, and I mourn her loss. She was a spoiled Madam of a cat, with a most unsettling start in life: she was one of two litters that Vicky was carrying simultaneously, with the wrong litter being born first. She was the only survivor of both litters, and both Vicky and her were nearly lost. She was often called ‘miracle’.

Myrrah

My ex is now left with two cats - both of whom were my fault. Talen, the eldest of the two was a cat with two mothers, as he lived with two queens, one of whom had lost her litter and was helping to raise the other’s. His name is taken from a character in the Elenium, by David Eddings - a boy with two mothers. Admittedly, my Talen isn’t a thief and an artist.
Talen

Cobweb is the survivor of the pair of kittens we adopted in 2001. His brother, Puck, was hit by a car at the age of 6 months

Puck is the sleeping white kitten, and Cobweb is the black kitten. They were so named because at the time, I was living in an old (AD1697) cobwebby house and the night he arrived, he kept hiding in corners and coming out covered in cobwebs. It was then very difficult not to call his brother, a little imp who got into everything and everywhere and generally caused chaos, Puck. They were two halves of the same cat, and Cobweb was devastated when Puck was killed.

I will miss Myrrah, for her tantrums (think a feline Violet Elizabeth), her pretty nose, her fearfulness and her purr.

Exeunt omnes,
originally uploaded by Purplekitten.

Random Cat is now a regular visitor to this restaurant: waiting outside the back door in the morning, and sauntering idly to the food bowl of an evening. Once he has eaten his fill, it’s off over the gate again, to do whatever a tom has to do during the day.

Much to Mogret’s disgust, I have given her the Wrong Food to eat this morning. What is wrong with me? Can’t I see that it is clearly inedible? Am I trying to poison her?

It’s amazing just how many expressions of digust and horror she manages to wrangle her little splotchy face into.

Sadly, for Mogret, no amount of prancing and wailing is going to make the slightest difference this morning. That can of poison was the last cat-feeding material that I have, as I have not been shopping this week.

I expect I’ll come home tonight to find her chasing an albatross around the room. Or a small pile of stomachs sitting on the garden path. This probably requires explanation: she consumes mice and baby birds and neatly leaves the stomach on the path. She won’t tell us why.

This week has been the longest,emptiest week of them all: philb is living at his mum’s house while she is on the Isle of Mull. His mum has two cats, one of whom requires medicating with accuracy and timing. We have one cat (and a half, I suppose as Random still treats this place like a restaurant), who requires the world on a plate, and subservient humans available at all times for reassurance purposes. Therefore, the Braggs are temporarily parted in the interests of cat-maintenance.

There has been a small spot of excitement though, in the arrival of my new Nokia 9300i. I wanted something suitable for reading pdfs on the train. I was not bothered about the lack of a camera, seeing as I generally carry my optio s4 around. I was mildly intrigued, and philb twitching with excitement about, the possibilities of a wireless LAN connection.

I have been most impressed so far: the interface is nice, the screen is glorious and all looks promising. I have crammed it full of my Open University textbooks in pdf format (the entire reason for the purchase) and will give it a thorough test on the train today.

We were rudely awoken by a cat this morning. This is a normal occurrence; what made this morning different was that it wasn’t Mogret that woke us. It was Random Cat.

There was a tinkly shattering noise from the kitchen at about 05:10 this morning. The alarm clock was not due to summon us from sleep until 05:40. That fact alone was enough to warrant grumbling but we both traipsed blearily downstairs… to hear a miowing that is truly distinctive.

For reasons best known only to Random, he had busted his way in through the cat-flap (we lock the Mog in at night as she is impossible to see and has no road sense) and was now yelling frantically from the middle of the living room.

I let him out the back door and he shot gratefully down the garden path to freedom, only to return seconds later when I put some food into the outside cat-bowl. He let me stroke him, despite his traumatic imprisonment, and all is well.

Given Random’s fear of being trapped inside anything, I’m a bit confused as to why he would break into our house. It shouldn’t have been for reasons of hunger: he was fed yesterday morning. I’m pleased to report that there was no antagonism between the two cats: what woke us was the mug he broke when trying to escape the kitchen, not the normal yelling you get when two cats meet.

Still, he’s a nice cat, if a little shrill, and it would be nice if he adopted us permanently. Once has has conquered his fear of being Inside Things.

Words cannot describe the sheer elation we feel right now. Random cat has been found and safely relocated back here.

About 20:15 this evening, we had a phonecall from the vet to say that Random had been spotted in their car park and that they would try and keep his attention until we could get there. I have never cycled 5 miles quite so fast in my life. By the time we got down there, they had managed to trap him and he was in one of their cages.

I asked the vet to scan for RFID tags; he has none. Not that this necessarily means he’s homeless, but it’s unusual for a cat not to be chipped.
We then had the problem of how to get a cat home on a bicycle, but luckily Phil’s friend Paul drove us home, with Random yelling all the way.

I feel very very lucky right now.

Random Cat has eaten more food, purred and been stroked (so he doesn’t hate me, at least) and is now wandering the streets of Holyport. We were going to keep him in, but he was so distressed at being captive, that we thought it best to leave him outside, where he is happy.

I wish more than anything that I hadn’t tried to take Random Cat to the vet. He escaped from the cat box in the car park, and is now lost and alone in a strange town. Words cannot describe how awful I feel. He’s such a timid cat that even if anyone sees him, he won’t let them near. We have been scouring around the area for the last two hours. The very worst thing is that we didn’t know for sure if he was a stray or not, so I may have just lost someone’s cat.

I wish life came with an ‘undo’ button.

Waitrose organic pre-prepared pineapple (in the chiller section) and half a pink grapefruit make for a yummy lunch.

Philb pointed out that the addition of some lemony goodness might have improved the blend still further, but by the time he did so, lunch had been consumed. Something to note for next time.

Incidentally, it is worth paying that bit extra for the white pineapple. The difference between the white organic, and the normal yellow stuff, is astronomical. Literally a whole world of difference. The white organic pineapple is melty, smooth and subtly sweet and makes the normal yellow pineapple seem crude and inedible by contrast. My pineapple-palette has been entirely reconfigured. No more can I consume the common-or-garden yellow pineapple, of which I had previously been so fond. Now, only the white organic pineapple (sold by both Waitrose and Sainsbury’s) is good enough.

In other news, Random Cat has been back and playing chasing games with our Mogret. It’s so cute. She’s flirting and thoroughly enjoying herself. It’s good to see her happy, as I feared she was bored and lonely. I have emailed the Cats Protection people (the rescuers of Mogret) to see what they think we should do about Random Cat. I mean, I want to adopt him and adore him, but not if he is someone’s pet. Although I wish they’d get him Done, as he’s making quite a nuisance of himself.. I gave some serious consideration to the idea of getting him a collar with a message-roll in it and attempting to contact a possible owner that way.